Jamie's Corner: What is My Password?

What is Jamie’s Corner? 

Jamie's Corner is a humorous look at life, in particular my life. 

In the movies, I am not the elegant lady that walks down the stairs and charms her guests with grace and beauty. I am the one that trips on her gown, spills wine on her new dress and tries to carry on a conversation with spinach stuck in between her teeth. Years ago, it used to affect my sense of self and make my depression worse. But I no longer see it that way. A writer once told me anything that does not go smoothly in life makes for a good story. I agree. And I have lots of stories.

View the full archive of Jamie's Corner here.

I made a horrible mistake; I forgot my password and got locked out of my account. I needed to call to get my account unlocked and change my password. Fortunately, that is not yet considered a felony, only a misdemeanor.

COMPANY: Thank you for calling I want your money corporation. I see that you have been a loyal customer for 20 years. Can I get you to confirm your account number?

ME: 123456IOU

COMPANY: What is your phone passcode?

ME: Go LA Lakers!

COMPANY: (Not with the way they’re playing this year).

ME: I’m sorry, what did you say?

COMPANY: I was asking for your phone pin?

ME: 5555

COMPANY: Thank you for that. Can you verify your date of birth?

ME: 05/06/2000.

COMPANY: (Really?) Ok, thank you. Please give me the last 4 numbers of your social security number.

ME: 2468

COMPANY: Thank you. Can you please verify your zip code?

ME: 99705.

COMPANY: I show that that is the zip code of the North Pole. Is that correct?

ME: Yes.

COMPANY: Are you still on 123 Elf Road?

ME: Yes.

COMPANY: What is your mother’s maiden name?

ME: Jane Doe

COMPANY: And can you tell me the name of your childhood best friend?

ME: Qui-Gon

COMPANY: Isn’t that from Star Wars? Oh, never mind. Now, how can I help you this afternoon? 

ME: I need to change my password. I got locked out of my account. 

COMPANY: Ok, I will send you a text to the phone number we have on file. I show it is 949-867-5309.

ME: Yes, it is.

COMPANY: Ok, I just sent you a text. Can you please give me the pass phrase on the text?

ME: Yes. The phrase is “Send more money”.

COMPANY: Thank you. Now I am going to give you a temporary password. It is We want more$fromyou2.

ME: Ok, thank you. Yes, it seems to be working. 

COMPANY: Is there anything else I can help you with?

ME: (Maybe give me back the hour I just lost from my life on this phone call?). No, that is all, thank you.

COMPANY: Thank you for calling We Want Your Money Corporation. And be sure to send in your payment early so we can earn more money off it. Thank you. Good-bye.

ME: Oh shoot, I’m locked out of the account again. (Dialing the 800 number again).